Sunday, March 25, 2012

How to Be Strong After a Breakup

When everything is wrong and you just want to cry all night, that's when you know you need to get over that ex. Everyone experiences heartbreaks, but being strong about it is another thing. Don't let your ex see you weak.


Never ever run back to them or call them all the time. You can just never let go of that special guy/girl that taught you how to love. When you guys break up, then it happens for a reason. Don't keep calling him/her and talking to them like nothing happened or try to make them love you again. It's not going to work out. It'll just make you seem weak and clingy.

Forgive and forget. Let things go and remain cool. Don't let your ex see you miserable without them, it'll just give them the satisfaction and an ego boost.

It's okay to cry at night. For the first few weeks, it's going to be a long and lonely journey. So it's OK to cry. Cry your heart out for the matter of fact. You are going to stop crying in the end because you'll get sick of it and realize that it's a temporary phase. Listen to sad love songs. It'll make you feel better and you'll realize that you can relate to them even more after a breakup. Get it all out and then deal with it.

Lift your head up high and move on. Don't let one relationship drag you down even though it was the best one you ever had. There will be plenty more and it's his/her loss. You are too good for them anyway. Tell yourself that. Tell yourself that you need someone who will treat you right. Just be strong and forget about your boyfriend.

Don't try to fling or have special relationships with your ex. It never ends up right when you just go back into that cycle. Yes, "that" cycle. Where you guys break up then make up then act all cute and happy but in the end, you'll just be heartbroken and cry. Yes ... that cycle. Relationships end for many reasons, so just forget about trying to "work things out", it'll never ever work out.

Consult a friend if you feel lame or played. When your ex plays around with your heart when he/she knows that you still want them, that's when you definitely know that he/she is not for you. It's OK to feel this way, completely normal. Don't hold your feelings in, talk to a friend and cry. Let them comfort you and let yourself vent your feelings. You'll definitely feel better.

Shop, exercise and socialize. It'll make you feel better to buy new outfits so you can look even more attractive. Not only will it boost your confidence, it will also boost your self-esteem. Looking good will make you feel good. Exercise is also a good way to vent your frustration and pain. Socializing with others would keep you distracted from your ex, bolster your self-esteem, and help you get over your ex. When you are occupied with other people, you'll think, "Hey! Being single isn't bad. I get to make new friends and have more time to myself". Flirt and mingle!


Do not regret any decisions, move on, it's for the better

Hang out with your friends or just find comfort in your bed. It'll help you cope.

If your ex tells you how they miss you and want to be with you, don't give in. It's all lies. They'll just end up hurting you.

Act happy and smile (even if you are not), people will approach you and socialize with you. Nobody wants to talk to someone that looks miserable.

Try to DELETE every memory of your ex in your head.

Go ahead and cry! Crying is good for your health, so make sure you get it all out in one night, you'll be letting out all that pent-up stress, anger, and sadness. After you get it all out, tell yourself that you're done crying, and ready to move on with life, then DO IT!

If you miss the friendship from before the romance, a year or more of separation helps. So does waiting until both you and your past love have found new relationships. At the point you feel happy for your ex that she or he is involved with someone new, that's a point that real friendship can be taken up again. You have to get over all your anger at the ex during the separation and no longer blame him/her for anything and no longer miss the relationship as such. If what you miss is the discussions of favorite books or activities, then that friendship may have been strong enough to survive the romance and its breakup.

Indulge every personal taste and pleasure that you set aside for the relationship, anything that wasn't shared. Now is the best time to do all the little things Your Way. Have anchovies on your pizza if you like them. Sleep in on weekends if your ex was an early riser who always had plans. Wear favorite clothing your ex didn't like. Hang the art or posters your ex didn't like. Listen to the music your ex didn't like. All these are ways of regaining yourself, rebuilding your sense of self as a separate individual rather than half of the couple.


After a Break Up: Remaining 'Just Friends'. BIG NO-NO! Accepting that your relationship is over is the very first step after a break up, and without this realization you'll be hard pressed to move on. Now is the time for renewal, not hopes for reconciliation. Sure, there may be a slight chance the two of you will get back together, but even the most astute 'get your ex back' manuals start with this first simple step: take a break. It should be a long break, a year or two. It's not emotionally safe to resume the friendship until you've stopped feeling romantic about your former partner completely - till you feel happy about it if they're dating someone else.

Avoid keeping remnants of the relationship lying around. Keeping things lying around your house/bedroom that remind you of him/her is not going to help the problem. You need to get rid of them. Throw them away, or put them in a box and put that away in the attic, or under that loose floor board in your spare bedroom. Either way, get them OUT OF THE WAY and OUT OF SIGHT.


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